"Dispute not, because ye see not..."

"...for ye receive no witness until AFTER the trial of your faith."

This last week was rough.  

ROUGH.

I've been battling a nasty cold that left me voiceless, restless, and feeling pretty darn awful.

I've fallen behind on so many things.

Plans I've been making keep falling through.

Honestly, for someone who normally finds it very easy to stay positive and find the good...

I'm having a hard time "putting on" a happy face.

And then, this morning, I got an answer to prayer that I wasn't looking for and did not want.
 It was not what I wanted to hear.

It was not at all what I wanted the Lord to tell me.

The answer was:  

Wait. 

Wait?

I've BEEN waiting.

I've DONE waiting.  I'm TIRED of waiting.

And that "been done tired" feeling followed me around for the rest of the day.

I finished the day grumpy.

(Which is always the best way to start lesson planning for Seminary... smh)

And as I was preparing my lesson for tomorrow morning

this scripture jumped right out at me

Ether 12:6, Book of Mormon

"...dispute not because YE SEE NOT,

for ye receive no witness UNTIL AFTER THE TRIAL of your faith."

 Then it hit me...
Why am I upset?

Because I SEE NOT, not because it isn't there.

My job is to have faith.

To hope for the happy ending, 

even if I don't understand the whens and hows involved to get there.

The witness comes after the trial.

I know that.  I've experienced that. 

And yet, it's still so easy to forget.

God knows me. He loves me.

And even if the answer wasn't what I was looking for.

He answered me.

He heard me.

Now I just have to do as He says.

Have faith and wait.

The witness will come 

as long as I have the faith to make it through the trial.

So, instead of ending today with a grumpy heart.

I'm ending it with a grateful heart--and a hopeful one too!

God is real.  

He answers prayers.  

And He LOVES me.

I may not see the happy ending, but I know it's there.